5 logoi pou eimai gamatos
Eimai gamatos. Pragmatika, eimai gamatos. Prospathisa na epikoinwnisw me mia etairia simera to prwi gia na steilw to biografiko mou kai sto field pou elege "peite dio logia gia ton eayto sas" to mono epitheto pou mporousa na vrw na me xarakthrizei htan to gamatos. Toso gamatos eimai. Tis proalles pali, milousa me enan kathigiti sth sxolh kai me rwthse pws tolmaw na perimenw na exw perasei ena mathima exontas apantisei se mono 1 apo tis 5 erwthseis. Otan toy exhghsa pws eimai tosogamatos poutha prepe na me perasei xwris na diavasei oute kan aythn thn erwthsh, mou eipe pws eimai ay8adhs kai pws tha me paei prytaniko alla emena de me enoiaze giati eimai gamatos. Xaxa, poso gamatos eimai.
den eimai enas aplos gamatos, alla enas gamatos me anisixies, simera me apasxolei to exhs thema. OK eimai gamatos. Alla ti me kanei toso gamato?? Ladies and gentlemen: Oi logoi pou eimai gamatos.
1. Eimai cool.
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Oxi apla cool, alla POLY cool. EImai toso poly pou den me epirezei tipota. Thn prohgumenh vdomada, afou vgika apo to grafeio toy kathigiti mou k afou perasa apo to prytaniko, hr8e mia 2metrh melaxrinh kopela kai afou ths apanthsa pws « nai egw eimai o gamatos » mou eipe na kanume sex. Egw thn koitaxa kai ths eipa pws exw se 45' rantebou gia kafe k den tha prolavw kai ths eipa syggnwmi. Thn syggnwmi den thn ennoousa alla den eimai pote agenhs. \ Pigainontas gia kafe kai enw hmun sto timoni, enas typos pige na mou spasei to parathiro toy sinodigou gia na mou klepsei to laptop pou eixa sto kathisma. Tote egw toy epiasa amesws to xeri ekleisa to parathiro kai etrexa se oli thn athina me ton typo magkwmeno sto amaxi mou. Me tsantise para poli gt toy eixa pei na mou allazei toys stathmous k anti na kanei ayto pou toy zhthsa aytos mou elege diarkws poso ponaei. Ekana volta gia 60' se olhn thn athina k tote thimithika pws eixa rantebou gia kafe opote xananoixa psyxraimos to parathyro gia na afhsw ton filo moy, gt me enoxlusan kapws pia oi krayges toy. Otan phga gia kafe htan poly omorfa. Tpt den me epirease oute ekeini thn hmera, opos pote. Afou eimai cool.
2. Exw panta ena epixeirhma
===========================
Simvainei akoma kai ston pio gamato na kanei lathi. ayto einai mia alithia. vevaia, emena den mou exei symbei akomi, alla tha mporusa na to pathw kapoia stigmi. Etsi loipon, gia na profylaxtw apo th dyskolh wra kai na mh xasw apo mia lathos kinisi to poso gamatos eimai, exw frontisei na mporw na protassw ena epixeirhma se katheti :-) Kai epeidi mou aresei na milaw me paradeigmata tha to kanw k twra. Tote pou hmun gia kafe, h servitora hr8e na parei paraggelia. Egw ths zhthsa ena club sandwich gt meta apo tosi odigisi me eixe piasei peina. Ekeini mou apantise pws den ftiaxnei to magazi kai tote ths eipa pws tha mou ferei ekeini ena apo ta goodys dipla gt peinusa. Ekeini den peisthke apo to epixeirhma mou pws peinusa kai mou eipe pws den thn noiazei. Isws to epixeirhma mou nah tan fthno – to paradexomai- opote tote ths exhghsa pws peinaw poli gt eimai sthn anaptyxh k prepei na faw oposdipote k pws an dn faw tha anagkastw na faw ekeini. To club pou mou efere htan poly wraio an kai h mlkismeni den eixe vgalei thn tomata kai gia na thn timwrhsw kathe for a pou pernage thn eftyna panw tis. Mou pire molis 10” na thn peisw, kati pou apodeiknyei an xerw na milaw me epixeirhmata h oxi, xaxa :-)
3. Exw katholiki anagnwrish pws eimai gamatos!
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Nai, exw. Otan gyriza spiti ekeino to vradi, dioti eixe paei pia vradi, kollisa sthn kinhsh. Epeidi eimai cool, de me peiraze pou exana ton xrono mou kai de me peiraze pou exana ton xrono mou gt exw para poly apo ayton kai tipota de me zorizei. Kathws eftana sto fanari, me eide enas astynomos o opoios molis me eide fwnaxe « o gamatos ! » kai stamatise thn kykloforia gia na mou valei mia mple seirhna apo panw h opoia eixe k ena koumpaki pou an to patouses ekane iou iou kai tote oloi kanan pera gia na perasw. Mou zitise siggnomi pou eixa kollisei thn kinisi kai toy pa pws den peirazei kai pws gamisa th mana toy thn proigumeni mera. Otan akuse ayto to teleytaio gelase giati nomize pws ekana plaka, alla egw dn ekana gt to proigumeno vradi eixe erthei sthn polykatoikia pou menw kai xtypage ola ta koudounia gia na vrei pou menw. Vlepete olos o kosmos me xerei san « gamato » kai kaneis den xerei to onoma mou. Telika vrike poio htan to diamerisma mou gt htan ayto pou eixe ta pio polla gynaikeia eswruxa sto mpalkoni.
4. Eimai panemorfos
===================
Eimai toso wraios pou fovamai na koitaxw to proswpo mou ston kathrefti gt fovamai pws tha ginw gay. Den exw koitaxei pote to prosopo mou gia ayto ton logo.. alla exw ipothesei pws eimai omorfos gt oles oi gynaikes otan me koitane sto prosopo erxontai se pollaplo orgasmo kai emena mou thn spaei ayto gt to patwma glistraei meta kai entaxei ama eimai sto dromo kai to poli poli na mou vraxun ta paputsia alla otan eimai sto spiti mou, ta panta ginontai xalia kai anagkazomai na katsw sto diadromo ths polykatoikias gia na perasei o prwtos anthrwpos pou tha me dei kai na prosferthei na erthei na mou ta katharisei. K ama aytos o anthrwpos einai antras h duleia ginetai grigora alla ama einai ginaika tha prepei na kanw sex mazi ths gia na pei kai se alles poso gamatos eimai kai tote k oles oi alles tha thelun k ekeines sex kai tha xw akomi ligotero xrono apo oti eixa palia kai tote tha arxisei na me noiazei pou tha xanw xrono gt dent ha exw pia toso poly.
5. Mou pire 5 lepta na ta grapsw ola ayta.
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Ki ayto symvainei gt to myalo mou kineitai me tromeri taxythta. Kaneis dn xerei me posi taxithta akrivws alla fantazomai pws einai poli megali. Mia fora eixan erthei kapoioi episthmones apo to Cambridge na doun me ti taxythta doyleyei to myalo mou kai mou eipan pws doulevei poly grhgora. Gia thn akriveia tha prospathisw na sas exigisw:
Ena saligari trexei me taxythta 1 km/h, mia xelwna me taxythta 4 km/h, o anthrwpos mexri kai 22 km/h enw enas diasthmikos piraylos me 300000 km/h. To mialo mou trexei pio poli apo ena saligari h mia xelwna kati pou mporei na fainetai logiko gt den exei apo panw toy ena spiti na kouvalaei, trexei pio grhgora omos kai apo enan pyraylo kai ayto mporei na fainetai apws paralogo alla dn einai gt to mialo mou einai tromera gamato. Malista einai to monadiko pragma ston kosmo pou einai pio gamato apo mena alla den me noiazei gt einai diko mou kai ayto me kanei pio poli gamato! XAXAXAXA
den eimai enas aplos gamatos, alla enas gamatos me anisixies, simera me apasxolei to exhs thema. OK eimai gamatos. Alla ti me kanei toso gamato?? Ladies and gentlemen: Oi logoi pou eimai gamatos.
1. Eimai cool.
==============
Oxi apla cool, alla POLY cool. EImai toso poly pou den me epirezei tipota. Thn prohgumenh vdomada, afou vgika apo to grafeio toy kathigiti mou k afou perasa apo to prytaniko, hr8e mia 2metrh melaxrinh kopela kai afou ths apanthsa pws « nai egw eimai o gamatos » mou eipe na kanume sex. Egw thn koitaxa kai ths eipa pws exw se 45' rantebou gia kafe k den tha prolavw kai ths eipa syggnwmi. Thn syggnwmi den thn ennoousa alla den eimai pote agenhs. \ Pigainontas gia kafe kai enw hmun sto timoni, enas typos pige na mou spasei to parathiro toy sinodigou gia na mou klepsei to laptop pou eixa sto kathisma. Tote egw toy epiasa amesws to xeri ekleisa to parathiro kai etrexa se oli thn athina me ton typo magkwmeno sto amaxi mou. Me tsantise para poli gt toy eixa pei na mou allazei toys stathmous k anti na kanei ayto pou toy zhthsa aytos mou elege diarkws poso ponaei. Ekana volta gia 60' se olhn thn athina k tote thimithika pws eixa rantebou gia kafe opote xananoixa psyxraimos to parathyro gia na afhsw ton filo moy, gt me enoxlusan kapws pia oi krayges toy. Otan phga gia kafe htan poly omorfa. Tpt den me epirease oute ekeini thn hmera, opos pote. Afou eimai cool.
2. Exw panta ena epixeirhma
===========================
Simvainei akoma kai ston pio gamato na kanei lathi. ayto einai mia alithia. vevaia, emena den mou exei symbei akomi, alla tha mporusa na to pathw kapoia stigmi. Etsi loipon, gia na profylaxtw apo th dyskolh wra kai na mh xasw apo mia lathos kinisi to poso gamatos eimai, exw frontisei na mporw na protassw ena epixeirhma se katheti :-) Kai epeidi mou aresei na milaw me paradeigmata tha to kanw k twra. Tote pou hmun gia kafe, h servitora hr8e na parei paraggelia. Egw ths zhthsa ena club sandwich gt meta apo tosi odigisi me eixe piasei peina. Ekeini mou apantise pws den ftiaxnei to magazi kai tote ths eipa pws tha mou ferei ekeini ena apo ta goodys dipla gt peinusa. Ekeini den peisthke apo to epixeirhma mou pws peinusa kai mou eipe pws den thn noiazei. Isws to epixeirhma mou nah tan fthno – to paradexomai- opote tote ths exhghsa pws peinaw poli gt eimai sthn anaptyxh k prepei na faw oposdipote k pws an dn faw tha anagkastw na faw ekeini. To club pou mou efere htan poly wraio an kai h mlkismeni den eixe vgalei thn tomata kai gia na thn timwrhsw kathe for a pou pernage thn eftyna panw tis. Mou pire molis 10” na thn peisw, kati pou apodeiknyei an xerw na milaw me epixeirhmata h oxi, xaxa :-)
3. Exw katholiki anagnwrish pws eimai gamatos!
==============================================
Nai, exw. Otan gyriza spiti ekeino to vradi, dioti eixe paei pia vradi, kollisa sthn kinhsh. Epeidi eimai cool, de me peiraze pou exana ton xrono mou kai de me peiraze pou exana ton xrono mou gt exw para poly apo ayton kai tipota de me zorizei. Kathws eftana sto fanari, me eide enas astynomos o opoios molis me eide fwnaxe « o gamatos ! » kai stamatise thn kykloforia gia na mou valei mia mple seirhna apo panw h opoia eixe k ena koumpaki pou an to patouses ekane iou iou kai tote oloi kanan pera gia na perasw. Mou zitise siggnomi pou eixa kollisei thn kinisi kai toy pa pws den peirazei kai pws gamisa th mana toy thn proigumeni mera. Otan akuse ayto to teleytaio gelase giati nomize pws ekana plaka, alla egw dn ekana gt to proigumeno vradi eixe erthei sthn polykatoikia pou menw kai xtypage ola ta koudounia gia na vrei pou menw. Vlepete olos o kosmos me xerei san « gamato » kai kaneis den xerei to onoma mou. Telika vrike poio htan to diamerisma mou gt htan ayto pou eixe ta pio polla gynaikeia eswruxa sto mpalkoni.
4. Eimai panemorfos
===================
Eimai toso wraios pou fovamai na koitaxw to proswpo mou ston kathrefti gt fovamai pws tha ginw gay. Den exw koitaxei pote to prosopo mou gia ayto ton logo.. alla exw ipothesei pws eimai omorfos gt oles oi gynaikes otan me koitane sto prosopo erxontai se pollaplo orgasmo kai emena mou thn spaei ayto gt to patwma glistraei meta kai entaxei ama eimai sto dromo kai to poli poli na mou vraxun ta paputsia alla otan eimai sto spiti mou, ta panta ginontai xalia kai anagkazomai na katsw sto diadromo ths polykatoikias gia na perasei o prwtos anthrwpos pou tha me dei kai na prosferthei na erthei na mou ta katharisei. K ama aytos o anthrwpos einai antras h duleia ginetai grigora alla ama einai ginaika tha prepei na kanw sex mazi ths gia na pei kai se alles poso gamatos eimai kai tote k oles oi alles tha thelun k ekeines sex kai tha xw akomi ligotero xrono apo oti eixa palia kai tote tha arxisei na me noiazei pou tha xanw xrono gt dent ha exw pia toso poly.
5. Mou pire 5 lepta na ta grapsw ola ayta.
==========================================
Ki ayto symvainei gt to myalo mou kineitai me tromeri taxythta. Kaneis dn xerei me posi taxithta akrivws alla fantazomai pws einai poli megali. Mia fora eixan erthei kapoioi episthmones apo to Cambridge na doun me ti taxythta doyleyei to myalo mou kai mou eipan pws doulevei poly grhgora. Gia thn akriveia tha prospathisw na sas exigisw:
Ena saligari trexei me taxythta 1 km/h, mia xelwna me taxythta 4 km/h, o anthrwpos mexri kai 22 km/h enw enas diasthmikos piraylos me 300000 km/h. To mialo mou trexei pio poli apo ena saligari h mia xelwna kati pou mporei na fainetai logiko gt den exei apo panw toy ena spiti na kouvalaei, trexei pio grhgora omos kai apo enan pyraylo kai ayto mporei na fainetai apws paralogo alla dn einai gt to mialo mou einai tromera gamato. Malista einai to monadiko pragma ston kosmo pou einai pio gamato apo mena alla den me noiazei gt einai diko mou kai ayto me kanei pio poli gamato! XAXAXAXA
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